I’m not her.

Waking up to sahur this morning was quite depressing. It was not because of not enough sleep, it was not because of the food, it was not because of the humidity but because my motivation has lost yesterday since I was a video call with my supervisor.

I admitted that as a student, you had to accept your teacher’s suggestions and advice, but if the points of comparing me with others, it broke my heart. It’s like you can’t change me. You can’t try to make it into someone you worked before. It’s me.

I’m not her. I’m not you. I’m me. It’s me. That’s all.

Writing this, so that someday, I will read this again, and try not to compare others. Writing this, so that someday, I will embrace others as it is. Writing this, so that someday I will not try to change others fitting my pretenses, but admit her weakness, uniqueness, and of course strength. Writing this, to remind anyone who reads this will not make the same mistakes. Writing this, to let you and me know that you do not know what others are struggling in their life. Writing this, to let you and me know that you do not what others are facing in their life in order to be able to stand up today.

So please, next time, whenever you are meeting someone, whenever you are conversing with someone, whenever you are criticizing someone, try and just try hard to compose the best sentence you can make out of your speech. Because the moment they take your word, the moment they capture your comment, it may break their heart, it may make emotionally unstable and it even can make their life become miserable.

If you believe that by filtering your word, it will make someone weaker and less strong, it depends on you. That’s what you think. I can’t change the way you think. But I hope you may consider that sometimes your word may cost more than gold and sometimes your word may cost nothing. If you think, you are prepared by the consequences and ready to be responsible for it then you are good to go.

After all, this is just my thought after considering what happened yesterday.

 

MARHABAN RAMADHAN

Marhaban tiba, Marhaban tiba, Marhaban tiba, Marhaban ya Ramadhan, Marhaban Ya Ramadhan~~~~

Tadi tengah terdengar lagu Opick-Ramadhan Tiba. Tetiba teringat satu cerita then why not tulis sikit. So nnti bosan-bosan boleh la baca-baca.

Dulu masa duk asrama, Tingkatan 3, saya dan kawan seronok sangat kalau ayahanda pengetua yang imamkan solat terawih. Sebab bacaannya pendek dan laju. HAHAHAH.

Almaklumlah, surau kami takde aircond. Jadi, kalau perempuan yang berkain sembahyang ni, habis je sembahyang lencun la baju kurung. Bila nak kelas prep, memang tak selesa. Sampai je kelas, berebut nak duk bawah kipas, sebab kepanasan. Tapi bila masuk asasi, seronok sangat. Sebab masjid ada aircond. Sembahyag pun khusyuk je  (wow!!!).

Sekarang surau kat rumah pun dah ada aircond. Takdelah masa sembahyang pun duk pikir, bila la solat nak habis. Bila la nak witir. Bila dah witir, bila la nak habis baca doa.

Cuba bayangkan, sabarnya orang dulu-dulu kan, mana ada aircond, kipas pun tak banyak.  Tapi sekarang banyak je masjid dan surau yang dah pasang aircond untuk keselesaan makmum. Tapi, kalau surau tu takde aircond, takpe. Orang-orang yang bersabar ni lagi banyak pahala.

Salam Ramadhan.

Random Thought

Sometimes, I lost my thought and just cry out of nowhere.

It is terrible; actually, just reminiscence the past.

Especially when you had a thought that makes you feel that you make a wrong decision.

The thing is everything happens for a reason.

What you have to do is just believe in yourself, wakeup, and continue to walk.

It’s a past, you don’t have to forget it, that’s what makes who you are.

Gift

The best gift that I ever had in my  life is Allah and Islam of course. Where I can pray, ask for something that I can’t with anyone else, ask forgiveness when I feel wronged etc.

Next is my family. My parent is the one that always supports me. Either in economically, courage, spiritual or anything. Yes it is true. Blood is ticker than water. No one can deny that.

Lastly for now, is my friends. Living in the boarding school since thirteen years old had taught me a lot. A friend in need is a friend indeed. Is it correct???whatever. Hummphhhh.

Talking about friends. I have a lot to tell. Maybe next time. Now, whatever it takes I try to keep this relationship goes strong and try to make it a moment that I will never regret.

Adios…

Bread

Sometimes when I don’t have appetite, I will eat bread. Any kind of pastry, bread and cake. Even I once dream to open a bakery shop.

This afternoon, just eating 4 slices of bread with some kaya and margarine. It tastes good.

Again. Sleepy.

Huhhh. Stop sighing please.

Move on please

Trying to forget something.

Women, or can I say most of the human or all human sometimes will feel that kind of liking someone. But you can control it.

At first, it might be hard. But then later, it will eventually  faded. So, what you have to do is don’t try to get along with it. Try to do something you like. So you will not daydream about it. Pray to Allah that you will not involve in  maksiah or zina. In Shaa Allah.

Thank you.

Tough

I may seem tough sometimes. Yes sometimes. However, there were times that I just so bad and awful that I felt so weak. Even, I kept thinking that everyone was so  busybody. Huhhh

I’m not trying to sigh or do not appreciate everything that I got.

I’m just been tired living such a ……..hahahah
Nothing.

Wish me luck for my tommorow’s quiz, exam, and presentation.

Peace yawwww

Daydream

I love to daydream. Everytime.

Even before I go to sleep.

It makes me feel so relax. Not just relax but makes me more energetic??

Hahahahah

Like a caffeine you drink in the middle of the night. It makes me awake. The aroma. Huhhhh

I’m so sleepy right now. But I have a lot of works to do. Can someone gave me some motivation words. Please.

Ok.  I know. I think I want to watch a video.

Inspiring video??

Hurmmmm…..

The one

Asaalamualaikum.

I have nothing to say. I decided to make this page for my everyday thought. Sometimes I can’t say everything I want to people around me and it make me  feel trapped. That’s how I decide to make this page.

Today, I wake up with sleepy head and anxious for my evening quiz this evening. I’m afraid and nervous. I want to have someone that can teach me. Please. I beg you. Hurmmm.

Hoping that everything will be alright.

Now, I’m still thinking about that person I love to observe. Actually,i’m just like not so kind of love. He looks so much like my brother. He makes me miss my siblings. Arghhhh. Waiting for the time  I can see them.

Nothing else. Good luck for my quiz.

Huuuhhhhh.

Stop it. Just continue study and revise. You can do it!!!!